Fundraisers and Charity Events

I’m not really here to knock the amazing work different foundations do (not all of them).

I just find it quite curious how voices continue to be silenced. I feel like there’s so many Autistic advocates who would be very interested in the opportunity to be heard by a room full of people who can make a change by donating funds.

I am aware that companies do this because, for the most part, it makes THEM look good.

Recently, a local Autism Centre had a lavish winter fundraiser with plenty of large companies and corporations who were quite pleased to contribute monitarily.

I was on twitter when my feed was absolutely bombarded with images of the event. My Boyfriend reminded me this was a BUSINESS FUNCTION and of course they are going to exclude Autistic individuals and that it’s more of a PR event.

I have been doing my very best to get the word out because I believe that people who are Autistic can contribute their voice to these kind of issues. When I found out about this event while it was happening I quickly sprang in to action.

Not only did I write each and every company that contributed, but I also wrote the board of directors for the Autism Centre that hosted the event. I did get one response which said I could BUY A TICKET for the event or I could become an “advocate” for this centre by making a $15 donation. Seems kind of backwards.

Please, Include us. Consider us as very knowledgeable advisors. Listen.

Margaux

 

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Logan Paul

To those who have struggled or continue to struggle, I am there for you.
I know how hard it is to deal with anxiety/depression/loneliness/social anxiety etc. I deal with these things often and I don’t know what life would be like without struggles.

I am so saddened that there are people out there who feel like they can exploit other people’s pain for their own personal gain.

This is the first time and I hope the last time I hear of this inconsiderate and ignorant individual. I also hope that he becomes less ignorant and learns from this gigantic mistake he made. I still believe he knew what he was doing and what the outcome would be. Seems incredibly calculated. It’s definitely a way to make the national (and international) news media.

Defending his behaviour is minimizing the pain that people suffer on a daily, weekly, yearly, lifetime basis. This person had a family. We need to honour those living and those we’ve lost.

Please seek out your local resource, family and friends for help. (I know that they aren’t always the best.)

YOU MATTER.

Love,

Margaux

My Story: Part 1

I was born near the end of the 80s. A time of plenty.

My entrance in to the world was a rocky one. I was born with a couple of birth defects and had surgery shortly after I was born. I had another surgery months (or weeks?) later.

I grew up in an upper class neighbourhood (in Vancouver, BC Canada) in a big pink house that wasn’t much older than me with my family being the very first owners. The houses surrounding us were mostly heritage homes, few of which are still standing today.

I attended a religion-based private/community school from Nursery 3 up until the 6th grade. It was horrible and I spent nearly every day crying. I’d start my day with a sense of dread, spend the middle of the day battling with my own self esteem as those around me diminished it any chance they got. I’d come home and have one of my parents ask me how school was or what I did. It was the last thing I wanted to answer and I would get scolded for being evasive.

I then transferred to a private school and the very same problems followed me there. 6th grade and part of the 7th grade. I wanted to vanish, forever. The kids were just as cruel but they didn’t spend 9 years of their lives growing up with me- not that it made any kind of difference.

I transferred schools again, this time it was a multi-modal program with another very high price tag for me to attend (yes, the last two schools definitely cost notable chunks of change). I had made a couple of friends, but I still felt like I wasn’t supposed to be there. I wasn’t sure where I would ever fit in. This time, it was a couple of teachers that I clashed with. Mr. H – he got mad at me through my ’emo’ years for wearing a spiked bracelet. He told me it was banned and that I was NEVER to wear it again. I kept asking why? What was wrong with it? I didn’t get a solid answer. I was very upset. I went to the office and the receptionists were talking about me right behind my back. I called my Mom and within NO TIME at all she came to the school and confronted the teacher. She asked him, point-blank, if he thought it was some kind of “S&M thing” and he wouldn’t say anything! She then confronted the receptionists and they admitted they were talking about me.

I love my Mom so much, she’s always been my #1 and ALWAYS been there for me. She’s my best friend.

The second teacher, Mr. F was the art teacher. He told me once that all my art looked the same and constantly excluded me from events that were meant for everyone. It was a struggle to KNOW that i was purposely left out.

This is Part 1 of my story. If you’re interested in knowing more, please let me know.

Love,

Margaux

Welcome to 2018!

Thank you so much for joining me in this new year! I hope that good things are to come.

How did you celebrate your new years? My Boyfriend and I hung out at home in our pyjamas. We ate Indian food and chilled out with our Cats. For me, there’s no other way i’d rather spent the evening.

Here’s my first video of the new year, enjoy!

Socially Inept.

There are plenty of us who are able to express ourselves and plenty who can not. I always hope when I share my stories that I am able to speak from deep within. It’s incredibly humbling when I receive messages of support.

To know that there are people out there who find what I say relatable and comforting is wonderful.

With everything that has been going on in the Autistic community, primarily those who have chosen to speak for us/at us without being Autistic, I feel that much more compelled to share the experiences that have shaped me.

I feel fragile and lonely at times. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I am still growing, changing and evolving. I realize that the sentiment “be kind” can be so much more. Hold the door open, say hi to someone! Maybe even practice random acts of kindness? The simplest acknowledgement can really brighten a human’s day.

Love,

Margaux

Hollow Twin

You never truly know the pain of losing someone who has been inspirational in your life until you no longer have the privilege of having them around. I believe that even after they have passed on, they are still there.

I lost my Step-Dad earlier this year, 2017 and it was difficult to see someone who was strong, bold, intellectual and had such a unique presence diminish so fast.

My Sister, Becky and her band mate Emmalee are the Vancouver duo known as Hollow Twin. The emotion gives me goosebumps. Their music is truly in a genre of its own.

The song “The Valley” is about the Chilliwack River Valley, the place where my Mum and Step-Dad spent many of their days together.

Learn more about Hollow Twin:

The importance of expression

I can feel incredibly trapped and caged when I am unable to express myself. Whether it’s art, cooking, writing or human interaction– my soul desperately cries out for the opportunity. I am a very visual person. I like to see what is going on in front of me. I engage, I live in colour. I like to dress up, I like to provide advice and talk to all kinds of different people, preferably without negative consequences. Sometimes the foreboding feeling of something negative to follow is enviable.

These are pieces of me, pieces of my soul and I will always look back on how many opportunities my expression has created for me. I want to connect with artists, writers and musicians. If you’re reading this–feel free to reach out!

So much more to come.

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To 2018 & beyond!

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I feel so incredibly lucky to have had the opportunity to have had 11 brands share their products with me to review.

I have always had lofty goals with having a platform to express myself and connect with likeminded individuals.

Things i’ve accomplished this year:

  • Focused on my blog
  • Ran two contests
  • Got a new job
  • Got a second cat

Things I plan to accomplish next year:

  • Gain press passes to events
  • Review films
  • Work with more brands/companies
  • Establish a media creation program for those who are differently abled
  • Network with those who can empower me and support my journey

I’m honestly so excited. I can’t wait to see what surprises are in store for me and for all of you. If you have any ideas or suggestions, i’m all ‘ears’, or shall I say ‘eyes’?

 

Actually Autistic: Rejection and Defeat

A fresh new start

Cups

Part of my mug collection

I got a new job!

I’m also super, super nervous about it. You know when nerves mix with excitement and a sprinkle of anxiety? That’s where I’m at. I actually kind of feel sick about it.

I’m going to be learning the skill and art of the Barista. Here’s to hoping I don’t get overwhelmed. If that does happen, I have to remember to breathe and utilize the support systems I will have in place.

I haven’t worked in four months and I haven’t totally minded it, but obviously it’s not sustainable since I have bills to pay, cats to look after, food to buy and so on and so forth. I’m constantly thinking of what’s the next big thing for me and I’m thankful I started this blog because the feedback, the support and the sense of purpose it’s giving me–well, it totally fills my heart with joy!

My inner dialogue goes a little something like this:

  • Will I remember the recipes?
  • Will I please the customers?
  • Will I handle the pressure?
  • Will I remain calm and focused?
  • Will I be able to handle the lights, smells and sounds?

I’m usually very nervous around food handling – especially if it includes leafy greens which is a big sensory-trigger for me. I know: A Vegetarian who doesn’t like leafy greens? Yeah, that’s right. I don’t do salads. I don’t do Lettuce, Kale or any of those Green, plastic-y foods. Nope, Nope, NOPE!

Fortunately, the company that hired me is exceptionally inclusive in their hiring and they will be able to work with my support lady at the local autism centre to ensure I have all the resources I need to be successful. For me, that’s everything. That’s the key to my success. I want to be viewed as being able to perform the job. I want people to know that those on the spectrum are capable of greatness! We don’t need a cure, we need support.