Throughout my life, people have passed judgment on me based on the way I look, act or quite frankly who I am.
I think the way I present myself has a lot to do with my sensory sensitivities. For instance: I don’t “dress my age” and I prefer wearing comfortable clothing such as shirts that are a men’s size small, jeans, and slip on shoes. I rarely wear makeup and I usually just brush my hair and head out the door. It’s already so mentally trying to go out in to the world that the energy I would use to make myself presentable gets used up so fast. By that time, i’m already beyond drained and I start feeling physically ill.
Sometimes I dress very casually and sometimes I look fancy.
My intellectual capacity is clearly questioned because some people, whether it’s conscious or not, believe that the way someone looks has to do with the way they think.
I was treated very poorly at a restaurant and I can’t say for certain that it had anything to do with the way I looked, but I wouldn’t be surprised. It seemed like I was stereotyped as dumb and trashy because of my use of coupons and was spoken down to – which i’m still feeling anxious and upset about.
The English idiom “don’t judge a book by its cover” is a metaphorical phrase which means “you shouldn’t prejudge the worth or value of something by its outward appearance alone”. For example “That man may look very small and insignificant, but don’t judge a book by its cover – he’s a very powerful man in his circle”. —Wikipedia
We all deserve a little kindness and compassion, no matter what we look like.

Photo by Stokpic on Pexels.com
Links of interest:
- Judging People By Their Appearance Is Not OK
- Neurotypical Peers are Less Willing to Interact with Those with Autism based on Thin Slice Judgments
- Autistics Make Others Uncomfortable, InstantlyDon’t Underestimate the Power of Kindness in Customer Service